Recollection

This is what I looked like a year ago (take a week).

And I felt like I could die.

Time flies!

Pregnant much?

Someone asked if I was pregnant today.

SLAP.

IN.

THE.

FACE.

And just a couple of days before,

my mom had just told me how I looked like I'd lost weight.

and my scale says I'm only 5 lbs over what I used to be before Jackson.

Who seriously asks that unless you're obviously showing?

I want to fall over and die.

Bitter Sweet

The sleep deprivation is still on.
But the break downs have subsided
and I may even be getting used to functioning on 3 hours of sleep at night.
The couch has become my new bed,
and the bathroom my first home.
I looked down at my belly today,
only to find that it has grown to the size of a basketball,
all in two weeks time.
My hips hurt.
My groin feels like someone hit me with a bat repeatedly.
my back makes me walk like a penguin,
and exercising does nothing but instigate pain.

But my baby boy moves all day long,
and I go to the doctor and he is healthy.
His heart is beating strong,
and he loves it when I sing to him.
James has taken on the calling of father,
and kisses his son on a daily basis.
He loves me and I love him.
We have a beautiful home to bring this baby into
and a happy family.


So complaining seems like a waste
when you have so many good things
to be happy about.
but just so you know, I'll probably do it again.

Lessons Learned in 2009

New Year resolutions are achievable most of the time.
Diet is never the answer: exercise is.

The kitchen is the place to make traditions.

The best dates are achived on the couch while cuddling.

Having role models will get you where you want to go.

SUV's are the greatests.
Allow yourself to eat what you want. Worry about it later.

Vacations are necessary for your well being.

Drinking water really does make a difference.
A clean house makes for a happy marriage.

Making friends only gets harder with age.

It takes not something awful, but something great to happen to you to realize who your real friends are.

Gardening is not for everyone.

Your husband is your real best friend.

You only learn by making your own mistakes.
When you find yourself too comfortable, you should take on something new.
You never grow out of procrastination.
The longer you spend with someone the more you learn to love their imperfections.

People do change, but only if they want to.

Give into cravings every time you get; everything tastes so much better that way.
Motherhood is the scariest thing I have ever encountered.
The body is the greatest work of art.
Things change and people do too. And that is okay.
At the end of the day, money is just money.

Happiness is found inside the walls of your home.

Love is something you have to work at every day.

Eternity

Almost two and a half years ago I went here
to become an eternal family with James.
And yesterday as I was there, feeling emotional as ever,

I realized that's exactly what we are creating;
A family.
An eternal family.
And I get to be with them forever.

I really like the ring of that...

Talk about worries.

Dear Life,
Why do weekends always end so fast?
we learned and listened to conference and told ourselves we would try and be better people.
I loved being able to be inspired and uplifted.
I'm still not showing...to people. I see my belly when I'm getting in the shower and there is no doubt it's there... but people are challenged.
All I want to eat these days is authentic Venezuelan food and I think my mom is getting sick of it.
Fall is here to stay and I am having a love hate relationship with its new weather. I've worn boots twice, and finally got to wear tights today, but I wish it was summer and I was still wearing sandals.
It is getting so hard to exercise when all I want to do is lay around, specially when my hips are hurting.
I. need. a. new. bra. It is seriously one of the funniest things that has happened to me and doing this just seems so odd, since I have been the same size for the last 5 years of my life.
Please help me keep my house as clean as possible; I don't like spending Saturdays cleaning.
Thanks for letting me fit into my pants still, it makes me feel like I still have a little bit of control over my body.

Please make this week go fast, I love the weekends if you couldn't tell.
Love,
Jess

This is What Happens When I Have to Make Decisions

Friday is the day we leave for Subway.
And I'm kind of dreading it.
Because I don't really want to die,
and James told me that was probably going to be
the end result.
Did I mention I am going to be the only girl?
That was a lie.
I'm just craving your sympathy.
But really, there's only me and another one.
So we might as well count us as one.

Is it me or do I sound a litte bit pathetic?

Typing this just made me realize that if I end up not going,
it will make me look like a loser.
So I'm probably going.
Because I'm having a case of low self-esteem
and need you to think I'm awesome.
Because I am awesome.
Not lame.

But you knew that

because you like me

no. you love me. right?

just nod.

Things you might not know about me.

I woke up one day and I liked Hawaiian pizza. I can't stand having my fingernails painted. I wear heels 6 out of the 7 days of the week. I love coconut ice cream. I drink very little of anything. I would choose to eat fruit over (almost) any food. I make promises to stop drinking diet coke about 8 times a year. I've always wanted to be really skinny. I never really learned how to play sports when I was younger because I was told those were for boys. I talk to myself constantly. I can't sing for the life of me. I wish I'd never quit playing the piano. I have to take advantage of creative spurts or my art suffers. I bite my nails when I'm nervous. I love my plants like they were my children. I'm afraid of animals but put on a brave face when I'm around them. I recently discovered I love tennis and I'm actual decent at it. I run for fun. I started dieting when I was ten. I love laughing until my stomach hurts. I cry about everything. I trust everyone too soon. I give people way too many chances. I forgive way too easily. I don't like being mad at others. I usually say I'm sorry first. I'm secretly afraid of tiny babies (I dont want to break them). I love being on vacation. I love to buy clothes. I have way too many pairs of shoes. It makes me sad that I always think in english now. I wish it wouldnt be so easy to forget words. I don't like when people take me too seriously.

I'm bored guys.

Olive Juice

Here's to two of the best years of my life

and to a happy future with you.

Thank you for making me smile.

Every. Single. Day.

Dustin Izatt

I am a year older and wussier too.

Today is my birthday.
Today I am really emotional.
I am thankful to be who I am.
To be happy.
To be so in love with the man of my dreams.
To have a family who loves me.
To be healthy... for the most part.
To have a job that I enjoy.
To own a house that we made our home.
To have a husband who spoils me.
To have a best friend who is always there.
To have sisters I never thought I'd have.
To have brothers who always protected me.
To have talents that God's blessed me with.
To be here. Today.

And all that because two people fell in love 29 years ago.
Thank you for giving me life, mom and dad.

Subway... you mean the sandwich right?

Nope.

I just committed myself to go on a little hike later in July.

As soon as they said subway
I got all excited because I thought
it would involve me eating a five dollar foot long.

Big mistake.
It involves cold water, and heights,
and me going off of cliffs where there is HEIGHTS involved.

So, there. I needed to make sure to get that whine out
and have some cheese with it.
(I really need to stop relating everything to food)

I'm pretty sure it's going to make me poop my pants.
And yes, I meant poop. Not pee.
But I'm still excited.

Only for Jesus

Well the reason I've been gone is because I have been deathly sick since last Thursday. I had another weekend from hell like the one I recently experienced on Valentine's weekend.
It was spent mostly in bed, pucking all of my insides. And yesterday was the first time since Thursday that I actually got out of pajama pants and maybe even put some blush on.

And that's only because it was Easter.

And Jesus deserves it.

Today I'm due at the doctors to tell them about how surprised I am I do not have GASTRITIS (I'm really not), and that I'm thinking that these symptoms come when you are on your last days.AND THEY BETTER FREAKIN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Because, seriously, getting parts of my body removed is getting kind of old.

Did I?

Did I ever tell you

I was born and raised in Venezuela?

I speak with an accent sometimes?

there are words I can't say in English?

there are also words I can't say in Spanish?

I am not mexican just because I speak Spanish?

I am (strangely) much whiter than I used to be?

I always loved white boys?

Well, I was. I do. There are. Sadly. I'm not. I am. I still do.

I love you James.

I'm a cheese ball. And I know you know that.

Mom and Dad

These are my cute parents.
Half the time they act like they're 15.

Going on 29 years of marriage.

And I'm lucky to have them.

P.S. Isnt my mom a hottie?

Our Future Dumbo

I dont know how this baby got these huge ears since neither or us have big ears and you couldn't see either James or I's ears in the pictures I put up, but he is kind of cute. and chubby. Which is most realistic if that baby has any resemblance to any babies in my family.

See you in a whiile, fat baby!

Make your own dumbo.

Cokeaholic?

Hey remember how I dont drink diet coke anymore because my body just doesn't need it, and how for the last two months I haven't even taken a sip of one and how I was so proud of myself?
Well...
I've had a tall, ice-cold Diet Coke daily for the last 3 days.
And my body needed it.
And I'm not even a little bit ashamed.

Does this make me a Cokeaholic?

Tomorrow it will be 2 years since James proposed to me.

And though he swears I didnt see it coming, I kind of knew.

You see, my husband is not really good at surprises, but he sure does try hard.

The way he (sneakly) put the ring on the snowman's carrot nose while we were making it without me noticing, how he took me up the mountains to a private little location, how hard he tried for everything to be perfect....

He is perfect.

We are really happy.

Saying "Yes," was the best decision I ever made.

I love YOU!

Leave it to Husband to literally brighten up my day.

And it's not even Valentine's yet!

Days Like These

Today feels like I have a constant thunderous cloud following me around with never-ending rain.

And it is days like these where I have nothing but a prayer in my heart to keep me from thinking that sometimes life is unfair.

It is days like these when it becomes incredibly hard to believe that everything happens for a reason. Because there is no good reason to why this may be happening to you.

We love you.

Sun

(image found on google)

Utah has been dreadful the last couple of days. Not one ray of sunshine to be seen anywhere and it was really starting to affect me.

Yesterday, the sun barely started coming out and by the time I was done opening all the blinds around my desk, the sun had hidden to leave me longing for it's warmth.

Finally, it decided to stick around for more than a couple of minutes today and though it has been pretty chilly out, it seriously made a difference.

And I am just happy.

And when Momma's happy, everyone is happy.

Do you understand now why I try to convince James (everyday) that moving to the Bahamas is not a crazy idea?